Quit Being Holier than God! Cuss at Him, already…

Maybe you’re angry. Maybe it seems like the world has let you down. Maybe someone has done something that hurt you incredibly… maybe they’re still doing it. Maybe you’ve prayed about something, and thought God would fix it, but it keeps coming back up. You might think it’ll never end. (maybe it won’t).

Perhaps the only people you trust in this world (the people that seem like the best friends you have, that seem like they’ve been there for you) are the people that your parents, your pastors (and all those other people that Thou Shalt Obey) are telling you to not be around anymore. To quit being friends with them, to stop talking to them. To find other people to hang out with.

All other questions and arguments aside (“but it’s hard to find new friends!” and “doesn’t God tell us to be friends with everyone?”), as valid as they may be, I’m going to suggest something that will change your life for the better. Your better. Not your parents’ better. Not your Pastors’ better. Your better. But the only way this will happen is if you actually apply what I’m going to tell you. And you probably won’t. But here it is anyway:

Be honest with God.

It’s that simple. And if you’ve already thought for a second that “I am honest with God!”, then I highly doubt you’ve really thought about what that means. Especially if you’re still having anger problems, rejection problems, or any of the above-mentioned problems.

Some of you, unfortunately, have a bad understanding of Being Honest with God. Also a bad understanding of Prayer, and what exactly it was that Jesus did for you.

If you’ve gone to Church for any amount of time, you’re probably already very familiar with the phrase “take your problems to God”. But how do you do that? Because you probably do it wrong.

My challenge for you is to be really honest with God. For example: Imagine that you’ve had the worst day of your life… your parents have been breathing down your neck, you’re grounded for a month for something you didn’t do, you got made fun of in a way that really hurt your feelings, and on, and on… and suddenly your best friend in the world shows up. Are you not going to vent? Are you not going to tell them how bad it is? How lame your parents are? How stupid you feel for not standing up for yourself?

Now imagine it’s later that night and you’re about to fall asleep. Oh yeah! You should probably pray for a minute before you head off to dreamland. (Just in case you die in your sleep or something, I guess).

How do you pray?

Do you start apologizing to God for being so angry, and asking forgiveness for all the insane cussing you were doing in your head (and maybe even out loud)?

If so, then I’m afraid you might be doing something we like to call “being Holier than God”. Which you know is impossible, so why keep trying?

See, God already knows how you feel. But He created you to be His friend – someone to walk and talk with. Check out the first few chapters of the Bible if you don’t believe me (or if anyone’s ever told you different).

You don’t have to be a good person to come to God and talk to Him. That was the whole purpose of Jesus coming to Earth and dying for you: so that you could have all the bad things you’ve done covered up – so that you could walk right up to God and talk with Him. So that you could be friends with God again. You can’t get “clean” and then go to God, because going to God is what makes you “clean”.

I think the problem is that you probably think you have to talk a certain way, or sort out your problems, or be clear-minded to talk to God. That’s completely wrong. God is there to help you with that. Like I just said: Going to God is what makes you clean!

But maybe the problem is worse. Maybe you’re so hurt, or so angry, that you really don’t know if you even believe in God anymore. To be honest, I’ve felt that way before. Yes, I’m that guy in the praise band, I’m a “youth sponsor”. I teach the Jr. High Sunday School Class. But there have been times when I have hurt so bad that I wondered if God was even there.

Feeling that way? I know this sounds stupid, but… Tell Him that.

If you’re angry with God, tell Him. If you’re so spitting mad that every other word out of your mouth (or in your thoughts) is a cuss word: tell God. Cuss to Him about it. Tell Him how sick and tired you are with everything going on in your life.

If you feel like you hate your parents: Tell Him that. If your heart is broken into thousands of tiny pieces, tell Him. If you want to kick and scream because of what someone has done to you – kick and scream right there in front of God. If you’re mad at God, tell Him you are.

Get the point yet?

The thing is, He’ll listen. He’ll let you get it out. And it’s the only way.

Sure, telling your best friend about your problems will get them out for now. Crying and sobbing into your pillow at night will help ease the pain. Balling and getting snot all over someone else’s shoulder at Church during an altar call will get it out for a bit.

But if you’re ever paid attention to the patterns in your life, you’ll know that doing that doesn’t work in the long run. The pain will come back up. You’ll feel the same way again. You’ll fall into the same rut. Your friends can’t hold you up forever. That person you trust will let you down some time. Probably some time soon. And even if they don’t: what can they do to solve your problems, other than listen to you talk about them?

I challenge you to take 5 minutes out of your day… Stop reading your Bible for five minutes. Stop listening to Praise and Worship music for 5 minutes. Stop relaxing in your bed for five minutes. Stop “praising God” for 5 minutes… and tell Him what you really think. Tell Him like you’d tell someone even closer to you than your best friend. Scream at Him if you have to. (scream in your head if it’s late at night though – you might freak your parents out, otherwise). Pitch a fit if you have to. But at whatever cost, be totally, completely honest with God, for five whole minutes.

This is a good place to say this again: He’ll listen. He’ll let you get it out. And it’s the only way.

You know – even some of the Super Holy people in the Bible did things like that. Really. Ever heard of Jonah? He was so mad at God, he even said to Him “see? I knew this would happen! I knew you be all forgiving and gracious to these stupid people!”. He was talking about the people that he hoped God would destroy. But God had sent him to preach to them, and when he did they repented of doing wrong, and God forgave them. But Jonah got mad. Jonah thought (knew) that those ignorant people deserved to die. Every last one of them.

The amazing thing is, God didn’t just Zap Jonah with some big bolt of lightening or something. He listened to Jonah. He let him get it out.

When Jonah was done talking (screaming?) to God, God simply had a few questions for Jonah to ponder. Did it all work out? Read Jonah for yourself.

Remember that guy Job? When God finally showed up (as far as Job could see, anyway), Job had some questions for God. God listened. Then, when Job was done, He spoke.

Also, read through some of the Psalms in the Bible. Several chapters in there, mostly between chapters 70 and 100, are really great. No, they’re not like the silly little love-song-to-Jesus type Psalms you normally hear about. These are the good ones. I encourage you to dig around in Psalms – you’d be surprised at what you find.

The whole point of this is to tell you that if you’ll just take some time to get completely honest with God, He’ll be better able to talk to you. Your answer will come. But until you do that, you’re just going to keep praying those same lame, hollow prayers – and nothing is going to change for you.

Remember though – you have to take time out to do this. And you have to wait for God to answer. You can’t just yell at God and walk away.

But, rest assured that when you open up to Him, it’ll get His attention. You have to get serious with God – but when you do, He’ll know you’re serious, and He will come answer you.

Now, you might not like what you hear once He starts talking.

I’m not saying that you can just walk around cussing during all your prayers. And I’m definitely not saying that you’re going to have any excuse not to obey your parents. Nor can you just stay angry, just because… well, because you’re angry. God has certain laws in place, and you just might have broken some of them. (God does say, “Be angry, but don’t sin”).

I’m just trying to tell you that if you’re frustrated: talk to God about it. For real. And be Honest about how you feel. Even if that means telling Him that you’re not sure if He even exists. He’ll understand – I promise.

When you finish, He’s going to start talking to you. This is when you need to listen. He might say that you were actually the person that was in wrong. He might say you were acting stupid. He might not. But He’s going to tell you what you should do about your problem.

He’s probably going to remind you that no matter what you do, what you think, or how you feel – He loves you. And He’s probably going to point out some things that you need to fix in your life.

But if you’ll honestly talk to Him – and Honestly listen to His answer… your life will change. How long it takes to change (for the better) depends.

I’m sure you’re smart enough to know that if you break your leg, it’s going to take longer to heal than a paper-cut. And some emotional damage you have may take longer to heal than others. But if you honestly talk to Him, like He’s a real person – like He really exists, not just in your head – He’ll start working on you immediately.

There are a million more things to say about this, but I’m afraid I’ve already confused you. If you have any questions about what I wrote here – or about life, or the things you are or aren’t allowed to say to God – ask me.

I may not know all the answers – but I know some other really smart people that might.

The End.